(Ad - Gifted) Once A Mother, Always A Mother by Annette Byford - Book Review!

On thing I have always said since my girls have got older is that there isn't many books out there on how to parent adult children. Some may say that once your child is an adult your job is done but I don't think so. They still need some guidance and us as parents sometimes need it too.

Recently I was sent a book, Once A Mother, Always A Mother by Annette Byford to have a look at.

Becoming a mother is not just a question of learning how to bring up a child it brings with it a profound change of identity. The same happens years later when children grow up and leave home and the mother’s job is supposedly done. Yet this phase of motherhood rarely gets attention. In this moving and thought-provoking book the author of A Wedding in the Family, Annette Byford continues her examination of how mothers experience family transitions and how it impacts their sense of who they are. The book focuses on the practical and emotional challenges and tasks of being a mother of adult children, from the experience of the empty nest through being a mother in law, grandmother and negotiating growing old.

The author draws on her own experiences, both personal and professional, to discuss how mothers negotiate this change.  She includes material from interviews with mothers and looks at these experiences against the background of analytic psychotherapy and family therapy. Also included is an exploration of images and depictions of mothers in law, grandmothers etc in literature and media, along with several, illustrative short stories on the theme of mothers and their adult children. Throughout the book there are discussions about what constitutes a successful or unsuccessful transition. 

Becky is 20 years old, 21 later this year and sometimes it is challenging to parent her while she is an adult living at home. This book gives a good insight into the next steps we will be taking with Becky: leaving home, meeting that special someone, maybe getting married, me being a mother in law, eek! and becoming a grandmother. Those things might seem a long way off now but when Becky was a toddler her being 20 seemed a long way off, it's good to be prepared. This is a really interesting read and it is reassuring to know a lot of mother's have similar thoughts that I have about our future and they have lived through it.

This book appeals to readers, mainly mothers, who are over fifty and interested in psychological processes in families, who may well have read books on childcare when their children were young, but who find themselves unprepared for this stage of motherhood. 

Would this book appeal to you?

I was sent Once A Mother, Always A Mother by Annette Byford free of charge in exchange for this blog post.

What I ate on a random Friday.

I remember seeing YouTube videos years ago when people used film what they ate in a day. I always thought those type of videos were so interesting. I thought I would do the same but in a blog post. I took note of what I ate one random Friday at the end of January.

I was up early this particular Friday so after a cup of tea I decided that I would have to eat breakfast. I am not great at eating breakfast so it was just a glass of fruit smoothie and a grain bar.

Friday's are always the best days for food in our house as it's usually when I get the food shopping delivered. It's doughnut day. hehehe I always buy us some doughnuts and they always taste the best on the day that they are bought. Mid morning I started to feel hungry so I got myself a snack, a doughnut of course along with a pint of orange squash. 

I am surprisingly good at drinking throughout the day and always have a glass of squash at hand, either orange or blackcurrant. Years ago I used to love sugary drinks and hated the taste of sugar free one's but now I prefer the sugar free one's and Vimto is my favourite squash. I always thought Vimto was just blackcurrant juice but writing this blog post made me realise that it has grapes and raspberries in too.

Lunch was a tuna mayo and sweetcorn sandwich, grapes and a couple of strawberries. That is pretty standard for my lunch although I usually have ham and tomato or ham and pickle in my sandwich. I found myself with the motivation to make something different and it was nice. I also had another glass of juice.

I had an afternoon of blogging, writing up blog posts for the next week and that is when I tend to snack. I am trying to be a bit more mindful about what I snack on and on this day I made the right choice and had a little orange and when I wanted more I sucked on a few mint humbugs. I am obsessed with mint humbugs and have been for a few months, they might be high in sugar but they have to be better for me than cake or chocolate. I had another glass of juice too.

For tea we had cod steaks in butter sauce with herby baby potatoes and sweetcorn. It was such a lazy tea, everything went into the microwave but it made a change from the battered fish and chips or pizza that we usually have on a Friday. We all ate at different times that Friday. I was hungry by about half five, Becky had hers at about 6pm, Ellie at half six and Stu at about 7pm.

With my tea I had a glass of Rhubarb and Ginger juice that I have recently discovered from Asda. It is so refreshing, I can see it being even more of a hit with me in the summer, I can just imagine drinking it on a hot day with loads of ice.

Later on in the evening I had a Reese's Nutrageous chocolate bar which are amazing. It's Reese's Peanut Butter topped with roasted peanuts and caramel covered in a chocolate flavored coating. I also had a packet of roast chicken crisps and a glass of Bailey's which I was still drinking from Christmas. hehehe

What do you usually eat in a day?

Our weekly meal plan! 6th - 12th March. #MealPlanningMonday

Last weeks meal plan went well. Becky and I ended up going out for lunch on Friday and had scampi and chips so the fish and chips was off the menu for the evening, we had pizza instead and because I got the weekly shop from Iceland we had to have the Chinese fakeaway on Saturday night. Sweet & sour chicken balls, egg fried rice, chicken chow mein, spring rolls and salt and pepper chips. 

I do love getting the food shop from Iceland and stocking the freezer up. We got a few new things to try. Sweetcorn fritters, the Aunt Bessie roasts and cheese and pepperoni potato skins and we will be trying some of them this week.

The builders are definitely coming back this week to finish off the work the did a couple of weeks ago. Hooray! Boxing in around the window, putting the skirting board and coving back up and giving it a coat of paint. They said there won't be too much disruption or mess, we'll see. I can't wait for it all to be finished.

On the menu this week we have:

Monday - Chicken Kiev's and baby potatoes. We hardly ever have chicken kiev's but my family all asked for them this week!

Tuesday - Bacon topped chicken crown with roast potatoes, parsnips, carrots, stuffing balls and Yorkshire puddings. As of writing this Iceland have a deal on where you buy a roasting joint and 3 sides for £12 which seemed like a good deal. 

Wednesday - Bacon and mushroom pasta bake.

Thursday - Chinese chicken stir fry. It's one of the meals in a bag from Iceland which you just fry up in a wok.

Friday - Pizza.

Saturday - Cheese and pepperoni potato skins with southern fried chicken wings.

Sunday - A fry up! Sausages, bacon, black pudding, mushrooms, baked beans and toast.

What are you eating this week?

Rain on the window. #MySundaySnapshot

The weather has not been great this week. It's not been that cold and the sun has been shining but we're had so much rain and it's not even the proper rain it has been that fine, drizzly stuff that doesn't look that bad but when you go out in it you get soaked. I only went to the garage at the end of our garden and had to change my jumper as it was soaked through. 

If the weather forecast is right this time next week I will probably be complaining about the snow that we are forecast. Brr! Hopefully then mother nature can send some warmer weather!