Tuesday 30 April 2024

The joys of having older children.

My girls are 21 and 16 years old although if you were to ask their age they would say nearly 22 and 17. lol They always like to think they are older than they are. Parenting them has been a journey and it's never going to be over but I feel like we have all levelled up and entered a new stage of life.

My girls and I

I am really loving the age my girls are at the moment. There is a good balance of them needing me but being more independent at the same time. I have found so many joys while having older children. These are some of them.

There is no more rushing around on a morning for me. Becky works night shifts and is usually just getting into the house as I am getting out of bed at about 8am. Ellie gets herself up up now for college and wakes me up for a chat just before she leaves to get the bus. It's so nice not having that rush on a morning. Years ago it felt like I would never have mornings like this again but here we are.

The girls have realised that money doesn't grows on trees and has to be earned. Becky has stopped wasting money and is on a saving spree and even Ellie knows that if she wants money she has to help around the house. It is good that they now know about money, I remember years ago when Ellie had a tantrum about not being able to have a toy from a shop because it was overpriced for what it was. She now knows what things are worth, mostly and that is a good thing. There is also the perk of now that they have their own money they treat me to a chocolate bar or drink while we are out and gifts for special occasions. 

I don't like sharing my worries with my girls but they do pick up on things and are a great support. They have a different perspective and offer some fantastic advice, sometimes. Sometimes their advice is not so good like when they tell me just to go and shout at our neighbour when she's being a bit silly. 

I feel like I could leave my girls home alone for a weekend (I wouldn't) and they would be able to feed themselves, not just snacks and junk food but real meals. Becky is an expert at pasta dishes and Ellie can make quite a few chicken dishes. The perks of this is that they sometime make me food and it is brilliant. I still cook our evening meal each night but sometimes my girls make my lunch and what is even more of a treat is getting a cup of tea made for me. Cuppas always taste better when someone else makes them.

Ellie is my beauty guru! She loves make up and all beauty related things and has introduced me to loads of new products and if I fancy a change from my make up I root around her make up drawers and bags and find something new to try. If it wasn't for her I wouldn't use primer or setting spray and I would still be using a rubbish mascara. 

Often I see drama on the Facebook group for our local area and of course it's only half the story but having girls who know a lot of people locally has it's advantages. I always find out the gossip. hehehe Or they will find out half a story, tell me and my dad or brother who are good for gossip fill in the blanks. hehehe

I am not the I.T expert in our house anymore, especially when it comes to things like social media, streaming music and TV. My girls are quite clever and have pointed me in the right direction many times. If I want to know anything about TikTok, they are the one's I turn to.

As my girls get older they have become not just my offspring but also my friend. We share hobbies, interests, and experiences on a more equal footing. We can chat for hours about what's going on in the world, TV shows and music and have so many laughs together which I couldn't imagine years ago.

Parenting older children is not what I expected, it's much more fun and still full of heart warming moments. I am sure in a few years things will change again but for now I am really enjoying this part of my parenting journey.

What is your favourite thing about having older children?


  1. Mine are a few years younger but I know that the time will fly by! I appreciate being able to leave them at home, just for a few hours during the day at the moment but it makes things so much easier if I want to go for a run or pop to the shops. It's also really nice to have proper conversations with them and I appreciate their help around the house even if it's just little things like putting their dirty washing in the basket or clearing the table. It sounds like you have two lovely girls :)

  2. It's no wonder there are a host of books about parenting older children, it's hard! No matter what the ups and downs life and their lives throw at you, to have a relationship as you described, offspring and friends, is a blessing.

  3. I love this post! My relationship has changed over the years with my kids -age 20 and 21. I have to say this phase of parenting is one of my favorites!

  4. This is such a wonderful post. I loved reading about your relation with your daughters. You should be very proud of them.

  5. I am LOVING the ages of our boys! We do leave them when we go on vacation (we do have family literally right next door if they needed help) and they have made some pretty great meals or have gone for takeout altogether, gotten themselves to work/school on time, and basically don't even seem to notice we're missing. LOL I love that my boys are so helpful around the house too; Ian often puts together furniture kits and things for me since he's so handy with tools and was able to get our generator up and running last time we lost power.

  6. I left my older two at home alone when they were 19 and 20 and they managed just fine, we had a short break away. My younger kids are older now. The girls are much more independent but I still have my baby...he hates it when I call him that because he's 13 now, but sorry, he'll always be my baby xx

  7. Thanks for sharing this post Kim. Parenting older children brings a unique set of rewards and experiences as they become more independent and develop their own personalities and interests. This post highlights the positive aspects of parenting older children, from meaningful conversations to shared activities and witnessing their growth and achievements. It's heartwarming to read about the joys and connections that come with this stage of parenting. Embracing and cherishing these moments can help cultivate a deeper bond and appreciation for the journey of raising older children.