Easing the transition from secondary school to college!

The transition from secondary school to college is a significant milestone in your child’s educational journey. It is a big leap that’s more than just a change in scenery. It seems that one minute you’re helping them with their primary school homework and now they’re on the verge of becoming full fledged young adults. It’s a big step for them and for us as parents too! My girls have both done college, my youngest is going into her 2nd year so I’ve had a front row seat to just how different college can be compared to secondary school. 

As a parent, you want to support your child through this change, helping them adjust to their new environment while encouraging independence and growth. Here are some practical tips to help you and your child navigate this exciting but sometimes daunting phase.

Embrace the New Learning Style!

Remember when your child first started secondary school, and everything felt so different from primary school? Well college is another big shift but this time it’s all about gaining independence. Gone are the days of a teacher walking them through everything step by step. Now it’s all about independence and self directed learning.

There's Less Hand-Holding: Gone are the days of constant reminders about homework and deadlines being sent to us parents. College is all about self management. I have only received about 2 emails in the last year about college and both were nothing to do with Ellie, just general one's about open days. For our teenagers it's a bit like being thrown into the deep end and having to swim on their own. Students need to stay on top of their assignments, manage their study time effectively and even seek out help if they’re struggling. That doesn't mean that you can't contact your child's college if you feel the need to. You can help your teen more if you know more about what is going on with their studies.

Free time: The learning environment is more flexible and so is the schedule. Ellie is only in college three days a week and those days are not full days as she is one of lucky one's who doesn't have to resit both her Maths and English GCSE's. This means your teen might have gaps between classes or free periods that they need to manage wisely. They can choose to study or hang out with friends. I have had to have words, several times with Ellie about how she spends her spare time. Encouraging her to study more and socialise less. 

Increased Responsibility: Teachers are there to guide and support but they’re not going to chase after students to make sure they’re doing their work. This is a great opportunity for our teens to develop responsibility and self discipline but it can also be a bit overwhelming if they’re not used to it. Help them set up a planner or use an app to keep track of deadlines and commitments. It’s a great way to teach them about organisation and time management without stepping in too much.

Offer Support, Not Solutions: It’s tempting to jump in and fix things when they’re struggling but it’s important to let them try to solve problems on their own. Offer advice and guidance but let them take the lead.

Tackling the Social Side!

The social aspect of college can be quite different from secondary school. The social side of things this can be a big deal for our teens. A new environment, with new people and sometimes a bit of anxiety about fitting in.

New Faces and Places: Your teen might find themselves in a new environment with students from different schools. It’s like starting fresh with a new social circle. This can be both exciting and nerve wracking. They might have to put themselves out there and make new connections which can be a big change from the familiar faces they were used to.

Encourage Social Exploration: Joining clubs or sports teams can help your child meet new people and develop friendships. These activities also provide a break from the extra work that college can bring.

More Freedom: With more freedom comes more opportunities for socialising but also more responsibility. They have to be mindful of the choices that they are making while they are out of your care. Sometimes they can make the wrong choices but don't be too hard on them, peer pressure has a lot to answer for, they will learn from their mistakes and you will too.

Stay Connected to Old Friends: While it’s important for them to branch out, keeping in touch with old friends can provide a sense of stability. Encourage them to make time for their secondary school mates, even if it’s just a quick catch up on social media.

Be Their Emotional Rock: If they’re feeling anxious about making new friends or fitting in, remind them that it’s completely normal. We’ve all been there! Sometimes all they need is to talk it out with you to feel a bit better about things.

Managing the Money Side of Things!

Ah, money one of life’s great lessons! College is often the first time teens have to manage their own finances, even if it’s just for lunch and travel.

Teach Budgeting Basics: Now’s the perfect time to sit down and have the money talk. Help them figure out a simple budget that covers the essentials lunch, bus fare and the occasional coffee. It’s a life skill they’ll thank you for later! Ellie hasn't been great at managing her money but is learning. Sometimes a drink from Starbucks is tempting but that doesn't leave much left over for food.

Discuss Part Time Work: If they’re thinking about getting a part time job talk about how they’ll balance work and study. It’s a great way to earn some extra cash and learn about responsibility but their studies should always come first.

Chat About Spending Wisely: Whether it’s resisting the urge to splurge on the latest gadget or learning to save up for something special now’s the time to instil good spending habits.

Encourage Well Being!

The transition to college can be stressful so supporting your child’s well being is essential.

Promote a Healthy Balance: Encourage your teen to find a balance between study, social activities and downtime. Regular exercise, a healthy diet, and decent sleep are crucial for managing stress and maintaining overall well being.

Watch for Signs of Stress: Keep an eye out for signs of stress or burnout. If you notice changes in their behaviour or mood have a conversation to see if they need additional support. Sometimes, professional help or counselling can be beneficial and colleges have a great support network. You just have to ask!

From personal experience, I can tell you that the college journey isn’t always smooth sailing. There will be challenges with academic pressure, social dynamics or just the strain of change. Be prepared to offer support and guidance and sometimes tear your hair out a little but it will all be worth it in the end!