Tuesday 28 January 2020

They're growing apart but there's still glimmers of hope.

My girls used to be as thick as thieves when we lived in Northumberland. They didn't really hang around with people from school or from anyone from where we lived until the last few months before we moved. They didn't play out much as it was too rough. They only had each other and were happy in each other's company. They would play together and they had the same interests. 


When we first moved house they were as still as thick as thieves but that was over the summer when they hadn't started school & college and didn't know anyone else around here, now they do I can see them starting to grow apart.

They have their own sets of friends now. Ellie has her's from school and Becky has her's from college and they don't really mix. Sometimes they will be at the park but each group at different ends of it. If Becky's friends come here they get on with Ellie and it's the same with Ellie's friends, they love Becky but they just don't mix because of the age gap which is totally normal. Becky goes off into town with her friends and so far I've said Ellie isn't with her friends. I still think she's a little young to go into town on the bus alone. She has a sensible group of pals but I don't know what they'd be like with a bit of freedom.

The girls are spending less and less time together even in the house. Becky is into things like TikTok and playing on the xbox. She would rather spend time in her bedroom than playing with Ellie and Ellie loves to do crafts, watch YouTube and play Minecraft. 

They are growing apart and it makes me sad. There is a 5 year age gap between my girls so I knew this would happen eventually but it doesn't mean I have to like it. They seem to have less in common now but there is still glimmers of how it used to be.


We had a lovely weekend. The girls played Minecraft together, they watched films together and they actually got along. It was like the olden days. We had an evening in front of the TV watching the Masked Singer and The Voice and they shared their sweets and snacks. It was lovely.

On Sunday afternoon one of Ellie's friends came and knocked for her and she said she wasn't going out, she was enjoying playing Fortnite on the xbox with Becky. On Sunday they played more and Minecraft. Ellie has finally decided that she likes the new Xbox One. It's not ideal them spending half the day playing on the xbox but it is nice to see them being together, having fun.

On Sunday night we all watched Doctor Who and it made me think I am going to more of an effort at getting the girls doing things together, especially on a weekend when they're at a bit of a loose end. If they're just wasting their time scrolling through TikTok or YouTube I will encourage them to play a board game, go out on their bikes or even do some baking. They are old enough now to be in the kitchen together so what's stopping them.

Have your children grown apart as they have got older? 

14 comments :

  1. There are 4 years between myself and my older brother, and we were never as close as your girls. I do realise that it might have been different if we had been the same sex, but I do think that maybe they have been lucky to have that close bond. And that I am sure that they will stay close. Great idea to have a family time each week though.

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    1. I have been so lucky that they have been so close. It is so interesting to read about other people and their bond with their siblings. x

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  2. Aww it's nice that they can still spend time together sometimes though. My nieces have a five year age gap and now they are both grown up, have jobs and their own places and friends. But they still make time for each other occasionally and have nights out together. My eldest two have less than two years between them and they have always been close despite being different genders. They will still stay up all night together playing video games. My girls are close two with a similar age gap of less than two years, but I've noticed they don't do as much together as my older two. Then there is my Little Man and no-one in the house has time for him :( x

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    1. It is interesting reading about other people's families.
      Aww! Your poor Little Man. xx

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  3. I don't have kids, but I was 5 and 6 years younger than my next oldest siblings. We are really close again now as adults so they'll come back together again. We still laugh about all the dumb stuff we did as kids.

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    1. I am hoping that when they are older they grow closer. x

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  4. I think it's natural. I would just leave them be. As teenagers they might have different interests but, given that the bond is there, they will probably be best mates again as adults. #MMBC

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  5. Are I am sure they are there for one another, sadly kids grow apart but as long as they care for one another that is important X #mmbc

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    1. They do still care about each other, despite the bickering. lol Thank you x

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  6. It is natural of course but yes tough to see sometimes. My oldest boy is now overseas and we all miss him but children seem to cope better than I do at least on the surface. I have not seen him for nearly 6 months - torture! No idea how he is coping really but apparently happy so had to let him go I guess now he is coming up 20 but still feels like child neglect. You will have that new challenge before you know it when one of your girls leaves home. Who would be a mum? #MMBC

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    1. It really is tough! It's another thing that we're not warned about.
      Aww! It must be torture not seeing your son. It's good news that he's happy.
      I don't even want to think about my girls leaving home x

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  7. My brother is ten years older than me so I didn't grow up with a sibling around as when I was 5 he was out doing his teenage thing. I would say we are close though, perhaps a protective bond on his part. I think as teenagers its a natural process to find your own way. I'm sure they will find their was back teach other with life experience too x

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    1. How lovely to read that you are close to your brother despite the age gap. Thank you x

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